The Working Mom by Kay Luna

What in the world? I’m shaking my head about this story out of Michigan.

A woman named Lisa Snyder has been warned by the state that she can’t babysit her three friends’ kids for about an hour before school each day.

Huh???!!!!!

Michigan state regulators warned that if she continued, she’d be violating a law aimed at the operators of unlicensed daycare centers. The state says no one can babysit unrelated children in their home for more than four weeks each calendar year, unless they are licensed daycare providers.

I don’t know what the reasons were originally behind the law. Maybe they were good ones.

But I’m seriously questioning why Snyder was targeted for helping out her friends in this case. It sounds to me like she was just trying to help out. Whatever happened to, “It takes a village to raise a child?”

This situation has spurred a big debate in Michigan, and now people are lobbying lawmakers to change the law. What do you think?

Are any of you considering joining me in the Poverty Diet Challenge next week?

This is part of the Student Food Drive, which is going on right now in the Quad-Cities. If you have a high school kid, you probably already knew that. I remember the days of running out to the store and buying piles and piles of canned goods for my son, so he could help his school’s efforts. Fun memories!

Well, the Poverty Diet Challenge is meant to show just a glimpse of how it would be to live in poverty. I wrote about it in my “Savvy Saver” column earlier this week. Participants will agree to eat only $3.43 worth of food for two days — next Wednesday and Thursday, Oct. 7 and 8.

I’m going to do it, and would love for you to join me.

Well, my initial thought was that I would survive on beans and rice and a jar of peanut butter, but maybe I don’t have to …

Here is a link to a Hy-Vee dietician’s recommendations for healthy-but-cheap eats during the challenge. Very interesting.

What would you eat with just $3.43 to spend per day?

My 2 1/2-year-old daughter is at the “Why? Why? Why?” stage. Endless questions.

Some are hilarious. Some are easy. I mean, I can tell her why it’s important to sleep, why we don’t touch our friends’ poop (yuck), why Mommies wear makeup but little girls don’t (she’s already beautiful, I tell her).

But I was really thrown off by her series of questions as we drove home from a pirate-themed birthday party yesterday. She suddenly realized that our friends’ dog wasn’t at the party, and she wanted to know why.

Sadly, the dog — who was a friend to all, even in his sickness (he was very old and had health problems) – had died overnight. Our friends hadn’t even told their own children yet. They didn’t want to ruin the party.

But our daughter had noticed old Herkie was gone, and wanted to know why.

I admit I stumbled over my words at first. Glancing over at my husband as he drove, I told her that Herkie had been very old and sick. I told her his body was very tired from the sickness, and he fell asleep and now he won’t wake up. Now, he won’t have to be sick anymore.

She kept asking questions, and so I did my best to answer. I told her it’s OK to feel sad about losing Herkie. He was a very good dog. I told her I was sure our friends would be sad to not have Herkie at their house anymore. But I also told her how lucky we all were to know such a nice dog when we could.

She accepted those answers and, soon, fell asleep for the ride home.

But her questions got me thinking about what the best way might be to handle such tough topics as my girl gets older. Every child is different, so I think a parent’s approach must be different for each child, too.

My gut tells me that I need to be direct and truthful with her, even when it’s uncomfortable for me. I can’t shield her from death and other sadness forever, even if I want to. Gosh, how I want to …

What kinds of questions are you facing from your kids at home? How do you deal with the tough topics?

Do any of you listen in on Friday mornings when I’m on the air on Mix 96 (96.1 FM)? If so, what do you think?

This morning, we talked about some highlights for this coming weekend, including somewhere you can get CHEAP, super-cute Halloween costumes for your kids today for just $5 (with proceeds going to the Children’s Miracle Network). Your chance is today from noon to 6 p.m. at Hy-Vee on Utica Ridge Road in Davenport.

We also talked about how families might want to head over to Niabi Zoo this weekend, which is its last open weekend of the season .. and mentioned that a big community yard sale is going on Saturday in Longview Park in Rock Island. My “Savvy-Saving” ears love the sound of that … I’m sad that we’re on the tail end of garage sale season.

If you missed us on the air this morning and want to catch up, click here to listen. You can also go here to listen to past shows.

What’s on your calendar this weekend? I’m counting on at least a few hours of veg-out time at home, but there are so many fun things going on …

Look in your closet. Wish you could make some room in there?

Here’s one way. If you have gently-used women’s suits or other business-appropriate attire that you don’t wear very often, maybe you’d like to consider donating it to Family Resources in Davenport. They will give the suits to domestic-abuse survivors who are (re)entering the workforce.

From Sept. 28 to Oct. 9, the Allstate Foundation is teaming up with Family Resources for the clothing drive.  You can drop off suits for the cause to Allstate agent Lori Rutten at 2318 Eastern Avenue, Davenport. Her phone number is (563) 386-4053.

This is part of the foundation’s “Tell a Gal P.A.L.” initiative, which encourages people to talk openly about domestic violence. The Web site, ClicktoEmpower.org, says P.A.L. stands for:

* Pass It On— Talk freely about domestic violence to break the taboo. Tell others that economic abuse is a part of domestic violence.

* Act—Take steps to protect your personal and financial safety, whether you’re in an abusive relationship or not. Never underestimate how small acts can make a big difference. 

* Learn—Empower yourself with the knowledge and resources available to help yourself, or someone you know, out of an abusive situation.

Do you know about other charities/programs that accept women’s professional attire for those less fortunate in the Quad-Cities? Please fill us in.

So, this is 39-year-old Brenda Ripslinger, the amazing marathon mama.

She’s seriously going to be my new inspiration to get me to work out more often.

Brenda, who I talked to for the first time on the phone last night, is one of many who will be running Sunday in the Quad-Cities Marathon. She will be doing the half-marathon, or 13.1 miles, which is very impressive in itself.

But last year, she ran in the half-marathon … when she was nine months pregnant! She gave birth just five days later. Unbelievable.

Brenda finished those 13.1 miles in 2 hours and 13 minutes. She ran the whole way, baby bump and all. She assures me she ran the entire pregnancy, so she was well-trained for the half-marathon, and had the blessings of her physician.

“And my husband (Jay) ran it with me,” she said.

Then, five days later, her baby girl, Gabriella, was born by c-section. She’s the fourth daughter of Brenda, a nurse at Genesis, and her husband. The other girls are Genna, 13; Lexie, 11; and Jessica, 8.

The baby — her Daddy calls her “Gabby” and her Mommy calls her “Ella” — will turn 1 very soon. And Mommy is gearing up to run the half-marathon through the Quad-Cities again this weekend.

This isn’t Brenda’s first time in a race since the baby’s birth. She ran a 26.2-mile, full marathon when Gabriella was 6 months old! She qualified for the Boston Marathon, but instead of going to Boston, she plans to run the Disney Marathon in January.

To put this in perspective, when I was pregnant the last time, I about passed out just walking/jogging the Quick Bix. I didn’t even really lift grocery bags! Brenda’s running puts anything athletic I’ve ever done to shame, pregnant or not. And I admire her so much for her hard work and determination!

She told me last night that she didn’t start running until she was 35 … ironically, that’s my age. So there’s still hope for me?

“Absolutely,” she said, laughing. “Running, walking, bicycling, whatever you like.”

“Running and staying active makes me a better mom and wife,” she said. “It gives me some `me time,’ and a break to clear my head. Exercising gives me a lot of energy and it helps with stress, also.”

You go, Brenda, and all the rest of you Quad-Cities Marathon runners! I’ll be rooting for you.

My 2-1/2-year-old daughter told me out-of-the-blue last night that her friend’s Mommy “has a baby in her belly,” and her friend is going to be a big brother.

“I want to be a big sister, too,” she told me.

Oh, boy. Not gonna happen (I hope). I explained to her sweetly that she is going to stay a LITTLE sister, not become a big sister. Ha!

I joke about it, but really, we are lucky that we CAN choose — we can afford to buy contraceptives, and knock on wood, we also could find a way to afford having another child, too, if we really wanted one (… and we don’t — I’m saying this out loud so my husband doesn’t read this and freak! Ha!).

After lots of anecdotal stories about the issue, a study was released today with the first real stats about the recession’s impact on women’s contraceptive use and childbearing decisions, according to the Guttmacher Institute.

Researchers found that nearly half of women surveyed want to delay pregnancy or limit the number of children they have because of economic conditions — and for about half of these women, the recession has heightened the focus on effective contraception.

Some say they have been forced to skimp by stretching their monthly supply of birth control pills or shift to a less expensive method (or not use any birth control at all) to save money.

Others say they have put off getting an exam in the past year to save money.

We’ve talked to countless people over the past year-plus about how the recession has impacted their lives. I also wrote a series of stories last year about why/how several Quad-City people decided to have kids, or not. But this new survey offers even more meat to the discussion.

What about you? Is the recession impacting your family planning decisions?

So, I’m back at work after a week’s vacation, which I enjoyed right at home. It was a very relaxing and productive week.

With my little daughter in tow, I got a bunch of errands taken care of, spent time with my 91-year-old Grandma, cleaned out some junk at home and even took advantage of some cool things happening right here in the Quad-Cities.

Some highlights:

* We went to Niabi Zoo on free day and Babycakes got to take her first pony ride. She was nervous at first, clinging to me so hard that I thought she was going to rip my shirt off. But afterward, she told me it was “sort of bumpy” but “lovely.”

* We went to a free family fun day/kite festival at Centennial Park in Davenport. Babycakes, again, was nervous at first about the huge kites in the air, but soon decided they were “cool” and that the river was “pretty” and “sparkling.” I also saw one of my friends from high school there with her son, which was fun.

* Did some serious bargain shopping. Case in point: I’m now wearing a pair of pants I got for $4 on clearance. I also scored a beautiful dress and jacket, originally priced at $100, for $9.97. Delightful!

* Took Babycakes “camping.” Well, not really, but she thought we were camping when we set up the tent in our front yard and hung out there after dark, playing with flashlights and curling up in a sleeping bag. She said it was “very exciting!”

* Brought Babycakes and my Mom with me into the studio when I appeared live  Friday morning on Mix 96 (96.1 FM). She didn’t say a peep when we were on the air, but when it was over, she grabbed the microphone and decided it was pretty fun. If you want to hear my part on the show, here’s the link.

Now, it’s time to get back into the swing of things here — and with all of you!How are you? Did any of you go to the kite festival? What did you do over the weekend? Did any of you hear me on the radio Friday?

Here is a FREE event for parents of kids in 5th grade and up … If you’re worried about keeping your kids safe on the Internet (that’s probably most of us …), this is right up your alley.

An Internet safety training session for parents – sponsored by Scott County Kids, and delivered by Hank Jacobsen, crime prevention officer for the Davenport police — will address cyber bullying, and offer warning signs that your child might be targeted for bullying online or through other technology.   

And the first 50 people to register will get FREE software to track their kids’ Internet activity.

Date:  Tuesday, Sept. 22 

Time:  6-7:30 p.m.

Location:  Mississippi Bend Area Education Agency (AEA), 729 21^st St., Bettendorf

TO REGISTER:  Contact Kylah Rasche at 563-326-8221 or krasche@scottcountyiowa.com

Looking for something to do this weekend?

Check out the Quad-City Times’ free — and family-friendly — “Reading Adventures” event from noon to 5 p.m. Sunday (Sept. 13) at the Mississippi Valley Fairgrounds in Davenport.

All kids, from birth to 6th grade, will get a free book … and they can also enjoy inflatables, a puppet show, crafts and celebrity reading sessions, among other fun. Hope to see you there!

Other things to note:

* Parents can make sure their kids’ car seats are hooked up right during a National Seat Check event from 9 a.m. to noon Saturday (Sept. 12) at the Rock Island Fire Department, 1601 30th St.

* Hungry for Chick-Fil-A? A big ad in the Quad-City Times says that on Saturday (Sept 12), you can get everything you purchase for free when you bring back your receipt from that day in October.

Enjoy your weekend! Talk to you next week.